Quite So Much
If it weren't for the clouds
I wouldn't love the blue
quite so much.
If it weren't for the cold shock
of the first step into the river
I wouldn't love dry land
quite so much.
If it weren't for the surprise of bright yellow fungus
I wouldn't love dead trees
quite so much.
If it weren't for the constant chatter
and the loud enthusiasm of children
I wouldn't love silence
quite so much.
©Mary Lee Hahn, 2016
Our fifth graders went to Highbanks Metropark last week for a field trip put on by the Ohio River Foundation, a group that works towards "protecting and restoring the Ohio River and its watershed." The Olentangy River, which runs through Highbanks, is a part of the Ohio River watershed. Our students took part in several activities that determined the health of the Olentangy River, and that reinforced the need to conserve our fresh water resources. This poem was inspired by our field trip.
Violet is hosting the Poetry Friday roundup this week at Violet Nesdoly | Poems.
Mary Lee,
ReplyDeleteThe structure and repetion in this poem is delightful. This would make a great mentor text for young writers.
Cathy
Mary Lee, it is marvelous how nature is a constant inspiration for poets to write. Your poem is unique in that it not only comes from observation but that it offers a different perspective on personal loves. It makes me wonder what mine are. I think Cathy is right. This is a wonderful model for children to follow and an incentive to look closely at our surroundings.
ReplyDeleteIt is the back and forth that makes each moment have so much pleasure, isn't it? The clouds that make the sky look so blue. Sounds like a good field trip, Mary Lee.
ReplyDeleteThis reminds me of when Vashti makes a dot without making a dot. Your poetry always helps me think differently.
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean: especially, sometimes, when you are well after being sick, you appreciate your health so much more.
ReplyDeleteMary Lee,
ReplyDeleteI agree with Cathy. I think your poem would be an excellent spark for a writing exercise for your students.
Delightful poem. Nice play on opposites and the yin-yang theory.
ReplyDeleteThis is a fun poem at multiple levels - the first two stanzas especially remind me of the common things that we love - the contrasts of them, possibly the ease of dividing them into good and bad... and then the third stanza takes a quirky turn to loving dead trees? - and then back to the road - loving silence after chatter. I appreciate all the twists of the things that make our loves uniquely ours.
ReplyDeleteOh, that contrast makes so many things beautiful. Love that you did the field trip which gave you, then us, this poem!
ReplyDeleteWonderful use of repetition and contrast in this celebration of life. :)
ReplyDeleteThe contrast does make things more beautiful and more appreciated.
ReplyDeleteIt would be fun to write one and see what other "If it weren't for" contrasts are important to each of us. And to have the students pick one thing from the field trip to write a stanza about - it sounds like they had quite an experience!
I've often thought this about clouds. Their bright white next to the azure blue makes each one deeper. And of course, coming home to quiet after the voices of children all day long is peaceful. Even though I love being with kids. I love how this poem captures it all.
ReplyDeleteHow wonderful to take a writing retreat and be inspired by nature!
ReplyDeleteLove the idea of your poem, anchored in the "quite so much" line.
ReplyDelete(If I didn't come away from the PF link-up with new ideas to try
I wouldn't love Poetry Friday quite so much!)
Gorgeous, Mary Lee!
ReplyDeleteWell worth the trip, I would say!
ReplyDeleteIf it weren't for the white cars
the black cars, and red cars
I wouldn't love a blue car
quite so much.
(I have often said I only buy other coloured cars so I can love a blue car all over again.)
Mindfulness, mindfulness, mindfulness... always inspiring, Mary Lee.
ReplyDeleteThere is a reason why so many school assignments used to ask the student to compare and contrast! You've shown us the way to do it well, Mary Lee.
ReplyDeleteLoving the extremes. Clouds and blue sky, 5th grade chatter and silence!
ReplyDeleteAs Cathy said, the repetition makes this work - and such true, honest sentiment!
ReplyDeleteAs a great fan of contrast in life and art, I love this poem. I was surprised to find that it was a field trip poem--I thought it would be a fishing poem for sure! : )
ReplyDeleteAt the risk of being repetitious, I'll add my voice to the others identifying this poem as a wonderful mentor text to use with students. The structure is accessible to all, yet the content can be easily personalized, and invites readers to give it a try. Well done and thanks for sharing! Sounds like a great trip!
ReplyDeleteDelightful.....fully present and accounted for in the moment of your poem...as you are in life. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteI see that I am in agreement with your other commenters, as is fair for someone late to the party. I will just chime in with a -- what they said!!
ReplyDeleteThis one is poignant for me. One of my favorites!
ReplyDelete