Unsplash photo by NordWood Themes |
Autumn Cadenza
Oak leaves drift down, a brown rustle.
Crickets are hushed.
Only sound --
plop --
acorns bonk roof.
Steady
drop.
Winter is here
when they
stop.
©Mary Lee Hahn, 2018
This poem is a Zeno, a form invented by J. Patrick Lewis. It has 10 lines with a syllable count that goes 8, 4, 2, 1, 4, 2, 1, 4, 2, 1. The single syllable words rhyme.
I've seen several Zenos in the Poetry Friday Roundup recently, and I thought I'd give it a try. I was inspired by the acorns falling, and I found my rhyming words first. The temperature dropped from the 80s to a morning temperature today in the 40s. On my early morning walk today, the silence was a bit shocking -- no crickets! I'm sure we'll have some more warm weather, but winter has served notice -- she's on her way!
Laura Purdie Salas has the Poetry Friday Roundup this week at Writing the World for Kids.
No crickets? Aw. :)
ReplyDeleteNice job! I can just hear those acorns . . .
ReplyDeleteLove this zeno, Mary Lee--very clever. And timely for me, because I'm getting ready to write a poem about the sounds of autumn!
ReplyDelete"Winter has served notice" here, too, Mary Lee! You capture moments like these so well. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteHow wonderful! The form is there...but I didn't even notice. I love that word, bonk.
ReplyDeleteI love the sound of acorns landing. I hadn't thought about the fact that when they stop it's winter.
ReplyDeleteWell done, Mary Lee! "Bonk" brings to mind the sound of horse chestnuts hitting the ground when I was a kid. Don't see many horse chestnut trees these days. We have lots of oak trees on our property, though.
ReplyDeleteNice ending!
ReplyDeleteI was picking hazelnuts off my parents' trees yesterday and let the very small ones fall on the ground for the squirrels. They don't really "bonk" (if you have seen hazelnut trees, you know why! Too much cushion).
I love it!
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteOur acorns are dropping, too, even though temperatures haven't much. I love the line "Acorns bonk roof." Zenos are fun to try. I wrote one with my students on Friday about the garden. We were "writing in the wild!"
I've been having a great time experimenting with zenos in my notebook. Yours is wonderful! I love how you end on the word "stop". Just perfect!
ReplyDeleteWell I love the poem and especially the
ReplyDelete"plop --
acorns bonk roof.
Steady
drop."
But I'm not ready for…
"Winter is here
when they
stop."
But I fear there's much truth here–thanks Mary Lee!