Poetry Friday -- Fallibility

image via Unsplash

FALLIBILITY

I am flawed. I make mistakes. I fail.
Miserably, and in cringe-worthy ways. All
the time. Yet I lift
myself up and flail
away at life, flatly
refusing to give up, refusing to take the bait
of “good enough.” I have the ability
to see the light in my aspirations, so I need to stand tall
and not bail
myself out with an alibi.
I’ll
not be a liability.
I’ll
try
and try
until I fly.
Until we all fly.

©Mary Lee Hahn, 2020

I tried the new poetry form introduced by April Halprin Wayland at Teaching Authors last May -- In One Word. I started with the word FALLIBILITY. I used an online word generator to find all the words that are inside FALLIBILITY. Then I wrote my poem, using those words as the last word in each line.

Doing the internal work of antiracism is hard. It's painful to unpack privilege, to understand that I have harmed children (and colleagues) with my blindness, to lose my individuality and take group responsibility as a white person for systems of inequity perpetuated by whiteness. No matter how hard the work is, no matter how many times I fail, I have to get right back up and keep going. I have to stick with it for the long haul.

Ruth has the Poetry Friday roundup this week at There is no such thing as a God-Forsaken town.

Poetry Friday -- If

photo via Unsplash

If it weren't for the fireflies'
Nightly silent
Fireworks
I might have forgotten how much we
Need even tiny sparks of magic
In our lives
To remind us of the size of
Eternity.

©Mary Lee Hahn, 2020

It has been so delightful to spend the week with the word IF! Thank you, Charles and Irene for the call for poems using IF as the first word of the first line.

I have poem notes and drafts in my writer's notebook between notes from Phil Bildner's talk on BookLove, Dr. Paul Thomas' NCTE/LLA talk "Teaching Without a Deficit Lens," Kelly Gallagher and Julia Torres' talk on BookLove, Cornelius Minor's NCTE Member chat, and April Baker Bell's NCTE talk about her book Linguistic Justice: Black Language, Literacy, Identity and Pedagogy. It's been the kind of week that has needed poetry woven throughout.

This poem got a lot of love when I polled adults and former students. But the more I thought about Heidi's feedback, the more I realized that it was the other one that needs to be submitted...after I revise the ending. Thanks, Heidi!

Linda has the Poetry Friday roundup this week at A Word Edgewise. She's got an In One Word Poem for us today.

It's Time to Get Rid of Some "Classics" in Elementary Classrooms

Recently I read this article in School Library Journal--Weeding Out Racism's Invisible Roots: Rethinking Children's Classics by Padma Venkatraman. There is a lot to think about in this article and a lot of actions to take once we do that thinking.

If you follow #DisruptTexts, they've also really pushed my thinking about the books I have in my classroom, the books I read aloud, the books I recommend to students. We are so lucky to have Tricia Ebarvia, Lorena German, Dr. Kim Parker, and Julia Torres pushing our thinking and sharing their expertise. Their mission (stated on their website) it is:

"Disrupt Texts is a crowdsourced, grass roots effort by teachers for teachers to challenge the traditional canon in order to create a more inclusive, representative, and equitable language arts curriculum that our students deserve. It is part of our mission to aid and develop teachers committed to anti-racist/anti-bias teaching pedagogy and practices."

Much of the work around rethinking the canon is connected to secondary classrooms. When we think of the "canon" we think of high school English classes. But there is definitely a canon in elementary schools. There are classic books that we have deemed "must have/must read" titles for our students. There are books that are grade level reads across a school or district. There are books that as individual teachers, we have committed to reading every year in our own classrooms. We hold onto them because we say, "Every child needs to read this book because I loved it." or "Every child needs to read this book because every class I've read it to has loved it."

Much of our commitment to these classics is about nostalgia. I love The Secret Garden and A Little Princess. My mother read both to me when I was in elementary school and I have great personal memories of them. I imagine during my first years of teaching I probably read them aloud to my 4th graders because I believed it was important to share books I loved so my students too could love reading. But when I revisit these books now, I realize the racist (and other) issues in both and would never read them aloud to students now. Dr. Laura Jiménez was the person who helped me understand the role of nostalgia in teacher book choice. In the article, The Overwhelming White, Straight, and Able Face of Children's Literature (Michigan Reading Journal, Fall 2018) she says, "Literacy gatekeepers want to share their experiences with important literature with their students." She then adds, "One major issue literary gatekeepers have is the assumption that a book that was good for them is good for all readers."

I have been thinking about my own personal nostalgia since listening to what Dr. Jiménez says about nostalgia. I have also been thinking of teacher nostalgia. I realize there are several books that were staple read-alouds during my early years in the classroom. I remember reading these books aloud to children and remembering them as anchors for joy around reading. I also remember these books as being popular with students in the years I did not read them aloud.  The Indian in the Cupboard and Touching Spirit Bear are two that stand out to me. At the time, I would have considered these fabulous choices for read aloud and independent reading. They were well reviewed by professional journals, well loved by students and really invited lots of incredible conversations. It didn't take me long to see the racism in The Indian in the Cupboard but in all honesty, it took me a while to give up Touching Spirit Bear. This misrepresentation in this book was less visible to me, but just as harmful. I am thankful for Dr. Debbie Reese's blog for helping me see the things I missed.

There are so many books that we hold onto as teachers and we have to stop. I have learned to recognize and ignore my own nostalgia when choosing books to share in the classroom.  I have learned that I can't let nostalgia get in the way of my professional responsibility. The nostalgia I have for certain books--either from my childhood or as a teacher -- cannot be the excuse I use to justify keeping these books in my classroom. 

Dr. Seuss and Laura Ingalls Wilder are just two authors that elementary teachers tend to hold onto. I recently read this NPR article about the reasons classics have such staying power. One point was, "And when planning lessons from year to year, it's easier for teachers to prioritize books they're already familiar with. But when these books include offensive stereotypes, teachers have to decide whether to continue teaching them and how."

It's time we all take a hard look at our classroom libraries and really look at the books we have, the books we hand to children, the books we use in mini lessons, and the books we choose to read aloud.   We have to ask ourselves questions like --Am I keeping this because I loved it as a child? Am I reading a book aloud because I always start the year with this one? We have to be honest with ourselves about the reasons we keep them.

And then we have to let some of our old favorites go. 

We don't have to let go of the happy memories we personally have of these books, But we must look past our own nostalgia to disrupt the elementary "canon" in our schools and classrooms. 

I am going to end with one more quote from Dr. Laura Jiménez, "You can hold onto the stories that build you at the very same time you are reaching for stories that will help the next generation of readers see themselves and others in this complex world."

White Fragility Cannot Stand Alone

This weekend I posted this piece on Facebook that Dr. Sonja Cherry-Paul had shared--Glorifying White Authors like DiAngelo Erases Decades of Black Writing on Whiteness. As a white woman who has read and recommended White Fragility often, I have been reading and listening to the critiques over the last week. These words from the article stuck out to me:

"Ultimately, the problem here is not that people are eager to read Robin DiAngelo’s White Fragility per se but that way too many newcomers to the racial justice movement fail to take the rest of the Black intellectual work as seriously. When white race scholars are revered and seen as exceptional, well-intentioned white Americans risk reading a trendy book by a white expert and not picking up a book by an established Black author at all."

I do see a few people on social media asking us not to read or recommend the book, but most of the messages suggest not reading this one book by a white author INSTEAD OF books by Black scholars who have been studying race and whiteness for decades. We cannot ignore the race work of Black scholars.

For me, White Fragility was an important book. It was a book that helped me see my place in all of this and begin to recognize and change my responses and actions. It may not have been the book, but it may have been the facilitated conversations I had around the book that was important. One important conversation was facilitated by Dr. Laura Jiminez at a Highlights Foundation workshop last summer. So I am not sure if it was the book or the conversations around the book. All I know is that it was one of many books that has been important to my own internal work.

After reading the concerns about the book over the weekend, I wanted to speak to other white women about our reading lives. I think as readers it is time we audit and change our reading lives. Until about 5-10 years ago, most of my reading was centered on white authors. I never really thought about it. I read books recommended by friends, books I noticed in bookstores and books that were reviewed in journals or that made it to a best seller list. What a limited reading life I had.

Then I audited my classroom library and committed to really paying attention to the authors I was bringing into the classroom. But that step alone did not change my life as a reader.

I've had to be honest with myself about a lot of things as a reader. Over the years I've asked myself the following questions:

• When I look at my reading, do I read mostly books written by white authors?
• Do I read adult fiction by authors of color? 
• Is most of my professional reading centered on white authors and experts?
• Why are most of the books that appear in my social media feeds written by white writers? What does that tell me about my social media feeds? How can I change that?
• How much of my professional reading life am I committing to reading and learning from scholars of color? 
• Where does reading about whiteness and anti-racism fit into my reading life?
• When I recommend books to others, are they mostly books by white authors because those are the books I know best?
• Who do I rely on for book recommendations?
• How committed am I to #ownvoices in my personal reading life?

These are just a few of the questions I've been asking myself and I hope others have been too. They are hard questions and I am not always happy with my honest reflections. Although White Fragility was an important book for me on my journey to learn about whiteness and racism, it was only one very small step on the journey. 

I have been working hard over the last few years to unlearn much of what I understand about the world, I've tried to read a variety of authors and to put my trust into those scholars who have been doing this work for decades and decades. In the process I have realized all of the brilliance I have been missing as a reader. I have missed so much --not only in my professional reading but in the fiction books I read. 

This is a stack of books from one of my bookshelves. Some have been read, some are waiting to be read, some have been read several times. I have this huge stack because after finding one book, I hear about others that seem too good not to add to my stack.  My (reading) life is richer because of this. Sadly, I had no idea what I was missing. But what I find is that one book leads me to another which leads me to another which leads me to a new-to-me favorite author, which leads me to new book reviews on Instagram which leads me to more books......

I may change my thoughts about White Fragility. I certainly understand the worries and the criticism and I am going to continue to reflect on those.  One thing I know for sure is that it cannot stand alone. 

Poetry Friday -- Sand Creek Cottonwoods

Credit for photo

Sand Creek Cottonwoods

At first

the shade

of the gnarled cottonwoods

lining the dry creek bed

is a relief.

Sun blazes

in the cloudless azure sky.

At first

the rustle 

of the cottonwood leaves

in the near-constant wind

is a susurrus.

Leaf-babble

in the wide silent plains.

But suddenly

the age

of the gnarled cottonwoods

and the dates on the battleground marker

sink in.

These trees witnessed

the Sand Creek Massacre.

And now

the rustle 

of the cottonwood leaves

repeats the names of slaughtered elders, women, and children

in a dirge.

Leaf-testimony

in the wide silent plains.

©Mary Lee Hahn, 2020

Back at the end of May, The Poetry Sisters invited All the Rest of Us to join them in their monthly challenges. The challenge for June was to write a poem using the imagery of thick woods and the word susurrus. This got me thinking about how Ohio was 95% forest (actual statistic) before the Europeans got here and made this land into 90% corn and soybean farms (not an actual statistic...it feels that way, but the Internet tells me it's closer to 50%). I did some research on the bits of old growth forest that remain in Ohio (it might be worth it to visit them all), and learned that they are so old that they are aging out. The oldest (400+ years) oaks and hickories are coming to the end of their lifespans and are being replaced by maples and beeches.

Research is all well and good, but I don't have a natural affinity with thick woods because there aren't that many trees on the arid high plains of eastern Colorado where I grew up. So I was a little stuck. Then, last weekend, I got unstuck in a completely roundabout way. I attended the (virtual, of course) Inclusive STEM/CS Summit. Two of the presenters began with a slide stating, "I am presenting on land stolen from the...(insert name of tribe)." This got me thinking about the Native inhabitants of eastern Colorado. Why didn't I know who they were without asking Google? (Arapaho and Cherokee) Why didn't I learn about them in school? Why had I never heard about the Sand Creek Massacre? 

When I read that some of the cottonwoods along Sand Creek date back to the mid-1800's and so could possibly have witnessed the massacre...well, I knew I had my poem, even if the woods there aren't thick in an "East of the Mississippi" way.

Karen has the Poetry Friday Roundup this week at Karen's Got a Blog!

Dictionary for a Better World--You Will Want More Than One Copy of This Book!

I cannot be a bigger fan of Dictionary for a Better World by Irene Latham and Charles Waters.  WOW!  I was excited about this book when I saw it at NCTE in Baltimore and I spent lots of time skimming and scanning over the past few months. But this week, I sat down to read it cover to cover. And WOW!  I am so glad I gave this book the time it deserved.

This book is brilliant for so many reasons. It seems to me that it belongs in every classroom K-12 and honestly, I don't think one copy of this book will be enough. There is so much here! Irene Latham, Charles Waters and illustrator Mehrdokht Amini have collaborated to create this brilliant piece of writing and art.  

First of all, the book is longer than I realized. I couldn't read it in one sitting as I intended. It is 120ish pages long and each page is worth savoring. 

Jennifer Orr seems to have a great strategy for reading this one:

Wish I had thought of this--it may be my strategy for a rereading.  Each two-page spread is definitely worth savoring.  So much to think about and so many fabulous visuals to add to each idea.

So, the book is set up as an ABC type book--a dictionary in alphabetical order.  Here is the Table of Contents to give you a sense of all that is here.

So, each two-page spread focuses on one of these words--these words that are really big ideas. The word/idea is explored with a poem, a quote, a connected story from either Irene or Charles, amazing illustrations and something to try. It is pretty incredible all that is included on each page-a deep dive into an important idea for a better world.  

I see so many possibilities for this book.  Sharing a two-page spread each day would be an incredible way to start conversations.  There are also conversations about action and narratives that move us to understanding that would come out of this.

I also see this as a mentor for writers. Each poem is a different type of poem and the authors teach us about those forms as we go.  I also think there is a lot for writers to study in terms of short, powerful narratives like the ones included on each page.  And the whole layout and creating a message with several different kinds of writing and images is so powerful. The word choice alone can become the basis for a year of study.

I could not love this book any more.  I am sorry to say I didn't make time to read it cover to cover before this week. Before this week, I knew it was good, but this week, I realized that it is more than good, it is brilliant for so many reasons.

As an added bonus, you can hear Charles Waters share several of the poems in the book here.

This is definitely a book you want to make time for this summer. It is one you will want for your home, classroom or library.  Order lots!

(I am happy to know I will be able to talk to others about this book as part of the Book Love Foundation's Summer Book Club this month!)

Poetry Friday -- WOKE

"To be WOKE is to understand that equality and justice for some is not equality and justice at all. We must stay alert. We must ask hard questions. We must stand for what is right--even when it is difficult and scary." --Mahogany L. Browne in the Introduction to WOKE: A Young Poet's Call to Justice

This collection of 24 poems by Mahogany L. Browne, Elizabeth Acevedo and Olivia Gatwood (plus an introduction poem by Jason Reynolds) is a primer for young people and their elders as we move into a new era of social justice. These are poems for self-acceptance and the acceptance of others, poems for both action and introspection.

More than anything, these are poems that encourage the reader to use their voice to make change in the world.

Pair these poems with National Ambassador for Young People's Literature, Jason Reynold's "GRAB THE MIC: Tell Your Story" platform through the Library of Congress.

Teachers, get ready to listen more and to encourage your students to talk back, to own and use their voices. Be ready to say to them

...stand up straight
lock your shoulders
open your chest
and say your human things so I can hear
you 'cross the room
'cross the world
over all this noise. 

(From Jason Reynold's introduction poem. Read the whole poem here.)

Tricia has this week's Poetry Friday Roundup at The Miss Rumphius Effect.

Poetry Friday -- Celebrating Nikki Grimes

Peonies have passed the baton to primroses in my garden.

In My Yard

Cat stalking the fledgling on the fence has thievery

in mind. The young bird is

ill-equipped for flight, never

mind lacking the defenses to

protect itself from tooth and claw. Luckily, I will be

the disrupter. In my yard, the value of all lives is condoned.

©Mary Lee Hahn, 2020

This week, the Poetry Friday community celebrates poet and author, Nikki Grimes. One of my favorite of Nikki's books is One Last Word. I fell in love with the golden shovel form through this book, and it taught me so much about the Harlem Renaissance at the same time. 

Today's poem uses the golden shovel form, and the striking line comes from one of the poems Nikki posted on Twitter recently:

Thievery
is never to be condoned.
Still, let's do some review:
Master muggers
pick-pocketed
Africa's antiquities,
pirated her ore,
heisted her humans,
and stole the land
on which we stand—
for starters.
Thugs?
Who?
TV nabbers?
Amateur grabbers.

Copyright 2020 by Nikki Grimes 6/1/20

Nikki frequently shares about her love of her garden and of nature, so I chose my own garden at the setting for this poem. Nikki is not shy about taking a stand with her poetry. In this poem, "my yard" stands for every place I have influence. I originally used the word "intercessor" instead of "disrupter," but that seemed like too much of a "White Savior" word. I like aligning myself more with those who are disrupting the narrative of White Supremacy, disrupting the canon of Western literature, disrupting the downward spiral of our democracy.

It was Irene's idea that we celebrate Nikki Grimes today, and she's got the Poetry Friday roundup at Live Your Poem.

(There's one slot still open on the roundup schedule for July-December...)

If You Change Nothing, Nothing Will Change

I love this story.

It used to mean just one thing to me: the importance of the individual, working against all odds to make change.

It still means that, but now it means so much more. I am learning to read the world through a more critical lens. I understand that framing action with individuality is a privilege that comes with my white skin. Now I see the hummingbird as Black people working tirelessly to put out the fires of racism while all the other animals are transfixed and made helpless by the raging fire. Especially the elephant. The elephant in the room. The elephant of Whiteness and white privilege, who holds so much power and could easily make a big difference in putting out the fire.

Now this story is reminding me that no matter how much good I (an individual) do in the world, the real power is in the We (lots of us working together).

That brings me to the quote in the title of this post, which has been haunting me these past several weeks as I thought of myself as the I, rather than the We. In my life in the past several weeks, nothing much has changed. Oh, I'm reading more, learning more, planning for better units of study, volunteering, protesting, donating...but my life has not been substantially changed by the events of the past month. Not by the police brutality, not even (too much) by the pandemic. Me, me, me.

However, when I look at myself as a part of different groups (We), I know that collectively, WE are making a difference.

I belong to NCTE, and WE are making a difference in centering the scholarship and expertise of Black members in all kinds of ongoing events that educate and empower teachers to address issues of race and justice in our classrooms and to work to change the systematic racism in education.

I belong to a Blessings in a Backpack delivery team, and WE are making a difference in our school community by delivering food to families in need on a weekly basis.

I belong to a local community who will no longer patronize a favorite restaurant that has left in place problematic policies and has refused to support Black employees. WE are making a difference by carefully choosing what businesses to support.

Perhaps my life doesn't seem to have changed much (me, me, me), but OUR world is changing.

WE are making a difference.
We ARE making a difference.
We are making a DIFFERENCE.

Every hummingbird drop of change makes a difference. Hummingbird drops of change can inspire elephant trunks full of change. It all matters. Every action toward justice is necessary.

Who Am I Learning From Today?

When I cleaned out my classroom last month, I grabbed this sign that was at the front of our classroom. It was one that we talked about often, formally and informally.  The idea that thinking with other people grows individual and collective understanding is a huge idea I want my students to leave the year with.  I also want them to see the power in thinking with different individuals--to not only working with their good friends or people they knew well.  I brought the sign home and hung it on the bulletin board in my office as a reminder to me, to hold myself accountable to that same thinking when it comes to my own learning.

Many of us have done better at diversifying the children's literature in our classrooms. We've been intentional about that thanks to groups like We Need Diverse Books, The Brown Bookshelf, Lee & Low, #disrupttexts and many other organizations and groups who are doing this work. Many of us have also started reading more about issues of race and racism. Last week, I wrote about books that have been critical to my internal work toward being anti-racist (You Can't Be Neutral).  For me, reading books has become a commitment to study and a commitment to daily action and I shared a bit of that thinking too. (Beyond Reading Books About Race and Racism) But this week, I've been thinking about intentionally expanding my network--really thinking about who it is that I learn from and with professionally. I have been thinking about this for a while but again, I have not done enough. These were just the first steps that I am going to build on.

Last year, the May 2019 #31DaysIBPOC blog posts were so important to my own learning.  These posts pushed my thinking and learning every day. And I realized in the middle of May last year, that this series was about far more for me than the individual blog posts.  Each day, I was introduced to someone who had a whole body of work. So even though I knew a handful of the contributors last year, I added 15-20 new educators to my list of people I learn from.  (If you don't know #31DaysIBPOC, you can read the statement from their website below.). You can read more about the initiative here.

This year, May was a busier than usual with the end of the school year and remote learning. So I didn't have the time I needed for #31DaysIBPOC.  I had hoped to read these posts each day as they were published, but I missed far too many days. So over the next two weeks, as I catch up on the posts, I also want to catch up on getting to know the writers and their work.  I glanced at the page and I know the work of about half of the people who wrote this year.  So in these next two weeks, I'll be reading the 31 blog posts and I'll also be intentional about catching up on the work of the writers I know and also studying the work of those I don't know.  I'll find them on social media and follow and I'll try to read some of their other work. There is so much expertise out there and I am committing time each day to learning from people I've known and new people I discover through experts I've come to trust.

Dr. Tracey Flores is another person who has introduced me to people through her Scholar Stories series.  In each post, Dr. Flores introduces us to a scholar with questions and answers we can learn from. She also includes Twitter handles or other social media links so that we can  continue to learn from these incredible women.  I caught a few of these on Facebook as Dr. Flores shared, but I want to really spend time digging into the work of these incredible educators.

And of course, there are the hashtags. I have recently relied on #educolor, #cleartheair, #disrupttexts and #diversityjedi So many important conversations happening on social media.  And it's not just about following a hashtag--these hashtags have been a starting place for me to see how limited my professional circle has been and to grow it intentionally.  To listen and learn from those speaking in these spaces, to pay attention to resources they offer and to follow people that they shout out.


In my talk at NCTE  in November, I said,

We have to expand our networks to honestly reflect on the day-to-day work we are doing in our classrooms and schools. Whether it is being open to learning so that we can find books that better represent the students we teach, or whether the learning helps us rethink the school traditions we have around Thanksgiving or whether the learning helps us to revise the ways we are using technology to better match what it means to be literate today. We need to listen in a way that allows us to grow and change our thinking. That won’t happen unless we intentionally expand the circles of people we learn from and with.

When we think about our own literacy, we have to be reflective and make sure we are the learners we want our students to be. As Peter Johnston reminds us, “Listening is the foundation of conversation and it requires that we are open to the possibility of changing our thinking. A turn to talk is not simply an opportunity to say what you have to say and allow someone else to do the same” (102). I think this is true for the students in our classrooms and for us as educators in real or virtual spaces. Am I joining the conversation with a learner stance or am I just looking to confirm my own beliefs or waiting for my turn to talk?

I've learned that so much of my work as a white woman is about listening and learning. So, I revisit my own words often to check myself.  Am I doing (every day) the things I committed to doing to grow my network? Am I doing enough listening and learning? Am I turning my learning into action?

There are lots of ways to grow your network and lots of questions to ask ourselves as educators. These are the questions I've been asking myself over the last year:

• Who am I learning from professionally? What are the professional books that I'm reading? Am I reading and learning from the same people over and over or am I committed to finding resources that push my thinking and expand my understandings?

• What workshops and webinars am I attending? Do I typically learn from panels of white educators who have been doing work around literacy? Am I listening to the same people/circles of people over and over?

• Who am I reading when it comes to adult fiction and children's literature? Whose social media accounts do I follow to find new books? How can I expand that? 

And this week, I am asking myself new questions based on my realizations and the gaps I have noticed in the last two weeks:

• Where am I buying my books? Which companies am I supporting? Am I supporting independent booksellers that have common values or am I buying from companies who support racist policies?

• Who do I know in my local community? How can I find the leaders locally and find ways to support local efforts? Which community leaders do I not know or learn from yet?

Going back to my question Who Am I Thinking With Today? is a way to hold myself accountable to expanding my network and doing more listening and learning from others who have committed their professional lives to this work.